voice; open to everyone

[billionboy]

OH, SHIT, CAESAR-- [ The voice sounds panicked since he is accesses the telepathy first to get obviously Caesar's attention before -- ] FUCK -- shit -- rocks! Ah! That hur-- ow! How long is -- goddamn hill! Ack! Ow-ow-ow-- shitfuckass!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

...Oof.

[ Long pause, muffled. ] I tripped.

Comments

[billionboy]

[ weakly: ] ... am I actually going to die out here?

[fivefingerdeathpunch]

No, Okuyasu.

[girasole]

No, Okuyasu.

[billionboy]

... well, ok.

You both said it real fast so I'll believe it. [ Long pause. ] Ah! I got a huge bruise on my leg and my pants' leg is ripped. I don't care that much about that but these are like my only pants from back home... this is kind of depressing.

[girasole]

It'll be fine. There's someone who can summon refrigerators with a wave of his hand. I'm sure there's someone who has magical pants-mending powers, or, if not, that we can think of something to fix them.

[billionboy]

Sure, sure...

I can't believe I rolled all the way down a hill. How lame. I guess it's because I'm just too street punk for this nature stuff.

[girasole]

[Oh my god. Did he just call himself a punk? Did he? He totally did. This is someone Caesar totally knows he would've pushed around five years ago, and he's calling himself a street punk sweet innocence this is why he worries about you.]

That's not a bad thing.

[billionboy]

Ya think?

[ Well. ]

Guess so. I'll be good for other stuff. Though, I don't think the boars are too easily intimidated by me. Maybe the crabs...

[tropism]

Yes. You will.

[billionboy]

Don't go chiming in with such a gloomy answer to this, Gio!

[girasole]

You have such interesting friends.

[billionboy]

Yeah, Gio's an okay guy with a rotten personality from what I've seen. But he's still okay.

[ Better say that he's okay twice. ]

[tropism]

I am more than okay. I am excellent. I can even write your obituary. See here:

We remember Okuyasu who has decided to fall off a hill with such conviction, to the dismay of his babysitter.

He was a good teenager who will be survived by his family and his friends.

Funeral arrangements to be made next week. His belongings will be lovingly partitioned by his friend and confidante, Giorno Giovanna. Riposare in pace.

[girasole]

Closed casket: I know open is what usually happens, but he might end up rolling out of the box by accident if we leave the lid off. We likely won't be able to find a mausoleum but I'm certain we can improvise.

[tropism]

Oh, of course.

In order to further avoid an unfortunate descent to a tragicomedy in five acts, the funeral is to be closed casket. His family and friends hopes that all attendees bear with this defiance in tradition as it is not done with impunity.

The rest of it still stands, as with the partitioning of belongings, etcetera, etcetera. I am expecting a quiet turnout, cannoli and coffee will be served. Or boar and crab with Disappointment, which is the norm by now.

[billionboy]

Both are you are real funny!

And I'm absolutely gonna kick yer ass when I get back to the camp, Gio! Is that any way to talk to yer friend who fell?!

Also... I don't want cannoli being served at my funeral! It's mine, right? I don't want that served. Can't ya think of something better?

[girasole]

What's wrong with cannoli?

[Oh my god what is wrong with you.]

[billionboy]

Anti-pasta is better.

Even if it is against pasta for some reason. Ha-ha! You didn't think I could figure that out, did you?

Joke is on you. I get at least 32/100 on my foreign language tests!

[ That is nothing to be proud about. ]

[tropism]

[ .... ]

The remains of his dignity shall be buried in a separate casket, for open viewing. It will be placed beside his original coffin, and attendees can pay respects to both.

[billionboy]

WHY DID YOU ADD MORE?!

[tropism]

Because I can.

[billionboy]

There's that rotten personality of yours.

[girasole]

Would we really need something the size of a coffin?

[tropism]

Wow. He's lucky there are healers here.

[girasole]

You heard what he just said.

[HE DESERVES IT.]