spellminders | ( ett • voice & video )

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( ett • voice & video )

( At first there's not a video feed, just a very simple yet disgruntled question: )

Does anyone around here know how to knit? I feel like I have to be missing something.

( In an effort to illustrate the point, there's suddenly a telepathic video stream attached, showcasing what appears to be a muddled ball of yarn; someone may or may not have resorted to trying to rub or melt it together because knitting is obviously just some type of witchcraft.

Hands attempt to pull it apart to showcase the expert craftsmanship that went into this mess -- there's also the sound of rain, as well as a small voice in the background that keeps shouting FUCK! over and over again with varied levels of intensity. The culprit is a chubby Elto baby that's crawling around just out of sight, a thick stick grasped firmly in their hand. )

Lisko! No bad words! -- Regardless, I have a suspicion that the problem is more so with the type of...materials...since they don't want to stick together no matter what I do.

( Or Emil's just an idiot, which is only somewhat more likely. )

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Better??????]

I don't mean that, I mean... [hecking heck words] Things are terrible! All the time, it's all really, really bad. And some nice things happen, but everything is still bad. And when you can think, how can just bring yourself to be so happy? It's the weirdest.

( Oh...the more existential asking of "how." This is a little more complicated, and his capacity for coherent thought continues to slip as he's been sipping in between exchanges. )

It's not like I'm happy all the time. It's just easier if you don't think about things that are too hard to think about. ( Easy is always better than hard. ) It doesn't feel good to just think about bad stuff. Even if things are horrible sometimes, good things are still...good things.

( These are Emil's 2nd grade level reading comprehension thoughts on the matter. Lisko appears to agree as their babbling gets louder and their words run together in long strings. )

[Not happy all the time... This is news to Lalli. Or at least to Drunk Lalli, who he's decided to make an entirely different person because then it would be easier to manage all of this weird shit going on.]

That's... That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

[LIKE... THINGS ARE BAD, PRETEND IT'S NOT???]

I still don't know how you're alive.

( Wow! )

It's not dumb! It just...is! You like when I'm happy, so you can't be too mad! ( If you want to see his smile so badly, appreciate his methods. ) Why do you think I'm so incapable all the time?

( He's not angry at all; Emil can't find it in himself to be that aggravated while also being drunk. Instead, it comes out more like a curiosity. They've broached the topic shallowly before...it's unlikely they'll get much further, both being inebriated. )

[It's pretty dumb...]

Nooo, just... [Well. Hmn. How to say it...] Like Lisko. They don't think about how dangerous stuff is or what words mean, or anything. If we weren't here, things would be really bad. I know things...were easy for you. Not like mine. But things still happen, and you're an adult person, not a lizzlard baby.

( LIZZLARD stop fat shaming their little plump princess!!!

Emil just keeps sipping, intently watching Lalli like he's being taught something interesting. It doesn't really compute, though. Not fully. )

I...know stuff is dangerous? I know now. ( Which is true in some ways. Does he accept that some creepy crawly critters and spirits are true threats and real? No. Is he still an ill-equipped klutz in a lot of ways? Sure. But he's not totally inept. ) Do you really think of me like a baby?

[HE'S NOT OMG HE'S JUST DRUNK]

I just said you were an adult person? I said people would kiss you.

( what the fuck i was waiting for a tag and never got the notif for this )

But you think I'm like a baby. Lisko is a baby! ( Oh, they recognize that word. Back to very fast tail-wapping. The person holding them isn't as impressed, nor are they good at finding the words they want right now. ) You don't take me...serious. And kissing has nothing to do with it!

( Emil's not angry. He's huffy, bratty, then disappointed. Also he's running out of alcohol since he didn't get much to begin with, so maybe top him off. )

[rude tbh.

He doesn't take him "serious"... Yeah, that sounds about right, and watching Emil now, it's hard to feel any different... Still, it feels like some thinking is important for this, so he stalls with a long drink. Finally, he reaches out to set the bottle next to Emil and slides himself closer.]

I think you don't know enough. There's so much you don't understand. It's...good. Mnbut I wish you understood so you'd understand me instead of the others. I don't know. It's confusing.

( On autopilot, Emil takes what’s somewhat offered to him. It’s not that it begins to taste better as he drinks more and more, but instead it’s something like he’s used to it enough to not feel like spitting it out. Even sober, Emil wouldn’t be so intuitive as to pick up on nuances like “instead,” although he gets something of the general gist of things. )

I understand some things! What don’t I? ( His stubbornness makes this feel more like a test than necessary. He can prove he’s understanding, let him!! )

[Hoo boy, this will go south fast.]

...I've lost everyone and everything. S'hard to...hope?

[That clawing inside when he thinks of a life, a real life, might be hope... Weighed down by everything else that came before. What a pathetic creature left scrambling.]

You can't understand what that's like, when you...have to fight yourself to make something matter to you.

( As sobering as Lalli’s statements are, they can’t completely eliminate the chemical reactivity of alcohol. Emil is silent for a moment, allowing the words to permeate as much as possible. No — he doesn’t really understand that. He’s simple. If something matters to him, it matters. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. Even when he’s feigning disinterest, he knows what’s up within his own brain.

Even more than that, he doesn’t get why you would ever need to really fight yourself at all. )

You haven’t, though. I mean, I know you’ve lost people before...but not everyone. You still have your tall cousin; the man. And then I’m still here. Lisko likes you, too. And you’ve got...you. ( Emil tics off the names and people on his fingers, suddenly a victim of a tenuous grasp on his alcohol cup. ) Just because you’ve lost things in the past, that doesn’t mean you can’t gain other things in the future. It’s possible.

Look — ( Gesturing to the lizard alien that has left his lap, tail wiggling around wildly as they roll on the floor. Their head moves back and forth between them, making sure they can observe both of these familiar humans at once. ) You certainly didn’t have...them, when you arrived.

[He goes quiet at that, drawing himself into a tighter bundle and trying to balance the haze of his feelings and the way the alcohol makes his vision fuzzy despite his best efforts to focus on this precocious lizard.

He's gaining things... Slowly. Lisko had been unexpected, but not to the same degree as Emil himself. Who would've thought that Lalli would so easily make a friend, try to force him away, then lean into the need for him even harder than before? As much as he might protest, Emil was still a bright light in his dark times. He's here with him, bringing in a lizard that depends on them, and reminding him that Onni is still there for him. Onni... Onni is going to hate him. He should have done better.

But Emil is here, and is trying to help him rebuff those feelings, and... And his shoulder makes an awfully nice pillow, doesn't it? Lalli releases a sigh and relaxes against the other boy in some wordless acceptance of whatever reality he wants to present right now. He doesn't have to tell Emil how often he thinks about how he's going to be losing all these little things he's gained one way or another. He can just...be here. With him.]

( Lisko observes the movement with some interest. Night Dad isn’t very good at sleeping or being...not awake. Rolling over, they shuffle over to him, curious about a relaxing dad. There are a few vague sniffs of him before they lay flat on the floor, suddenly sleepy themselves.

Emil, on the other hand, isn’t sleepy at all. Lalli can be such a mystery at times. He’s still not totally aware of his moods when it comes to being touched, which usually he refrains as much as he can consciously do it. Still, he’s a tactile type of person. His friend’s comfort in his presence adds to how floaty it makes him feel, with the alcohol pushing his fading brain along. Emil has no idea what this means in the context of his little reassurance, but he’ll take it to be a victory.

Despite the rain getting louder and the hut’s various gaps and blemishes making it cold and moist inside, it was...comfortable. Almost unaware of what he’s doing, Emil leans back, slightly uncomfortable by the neck position but at peace against Lalli’s hair. Lalli’s already touching him; he should be okay to reciprocate. )

Mmm...I like this. ( His voice is tinged with a drunken happiness that allows for unbridled honesty. He wouldn’t be afraid of saying that sober, but even Emil might be embarrassed by just how much he means it and how much it shows. )

[Emil likes this, too... The confirmation is enough to make it feel like suddenly an apple has lodged itself in his throat, but he can feel himself smiling, too. Lalli hums softly, not wanting to move, but... Well. He turns his face inward to give a split second nuzzle before drawing back enough to reward Emil with the sight he'd whined about not getting to see earlier. Enjoy this rare smile, friend.]

...I do, too. This is nice.

[And actually, Lisko needs to be picked up and held close so that they can all be one tight cuddlepile. Hello, little lizard, let's all be warm together.]

Edited (I'm mortified) 2017-11-26 02:37 (UTC)

( Half of him had been drunk and too easily without shame the first time, and the other half of him was excited to see his friend happy. It’s also not that he’s never seen Lalli smile before. This time...this particular smile.

A hot coal has settled in the core of his body. A hand exists within his body, squeezing his lungs tightly closed. It’s almost like his magic, but it feels unruly again. Like when he was first on the island; he can’t tell it to stop and be somewhat assured it would listen.

The sudden nervous shock distracts him from his actual magic, his spike of emotions suddenly making it hard to even think about controlling both existing sensations. That mystery meat Lalli brought home suddenly ignites, surrounding the slab in a shocking but managable flame.

Oops. That killed the moment. )

I, uh. Guess the food’s done? ( He’ll get his shit together and put it out in a second, promise. At least Lisko has something new to gurgle at, now. )

[balls]

...

[Sorry, he's just...staring... What a sudden, random disaster. Whatever could have caused this strange occurrence?]

...It's still going to be better than Mikkel's cooking.

[bless drinking causing a lack of a filter.]

( Sorry he’s an idiot, but at least he’s a cute idiot??? )

Definitely better. ( He might be more insulted if he put effort into this disaster piece. The fire burns for about 30 more seconds before Emil’s brain finally catches up to the idea that oh, he should...probably put that out. At least it’s not too difficult to do, even inebriated. Hope you like your...meaty animal meat...charred.

It’s not like Emil makes a move to eat any of it, regardless. Moving seems like a chore right now seeing as he’s so comfortable. Instead, he’ll play the awkward, proper host. )

Do you want any? Lisko, I think... ( The lizard of the hour is very excited suddenly, though mostly because of the sudden fire display, not the burnt meat. )

[That's right, kiddo, magic's neat. Lalli gives a small grumble before pushing himself up so he can carve up this sucker into proper portions. Food...]

They can have most of it, but I'm hungry. Even though I feel fuller now than I did when I got home? [Liquid food.] Ssstill too much...doing stuff. Unhappy magic.

[Scout Needs Food Badly]

You didn't eat, right?

( Well, Emil can’t complain that Lalli is eating, even if it means his source of warmth biproxy is getting up and leaving his side all cold. )

Oh. Only a little, but I’m not that hungry right now. ( Realistically, he could eat. But his mouth is more in tune with the queasy feeling left in his stomach (that he’ll blame on alcohol) than his brain. Putting food on his stomach will help him feel less sick later, but he doesn’t have a great track record with good decisions.

Lisko will eat enough for the both of them, though. They’re totally okay with getting the larger part of the meat, as showcased by how they latch their mouth onto a corner of the slab and begin to gnaw. Feel free to cut around them. )

[omg baby..........what

okay he's gonna carefully...saw a circle around this shit... Just stay where you are, Lisko. Once he's got a fair enough slice, Lalli returns to his spot beside Emil to DEVOUR THIS BLOODY BURNT MYSTERY BEAST

I'm tired]

Hn...

[would you like him to feed you a tiny cube, chef?]

( If by ‘chef’ you mean ‘meat igniter,’ sure. Emil has no objections to Lisko’s display of their lack of table manners at the moment. It’s a slab of burnt meat in the middle of a hut and he’s drunk. Let them act like a cave creature for a second.

Onto the more...Lalli thing going on. Let Emil casually point to himself, because this noise and semi-gesture is confusing to him. )

Yes....? ( His and my answer, both. )

[just don't choke

This goes for both Lisko and Emil, since Lalli wastes no time clumsily leading the cube to Emil's mouth. Your turn!!!]

( I didn’t think you would take that feeder kink thing seriously and yet here we are...

Emil opens his mouth and takes what’s offered to him, only marginally weirded out. He said he wasn’t hungry and yet...oh well, he’ll take this strange gesture of friendship from Lalli. This meat is barely edible, though. Time to wash that down with more alcohol. )

Now will you tell me what this is? ( Maybe you could have been more insistent about that before you ate it, asshole. )

[I'm unstoppable, unfortunately.

Lalli snorts and stabs himself another piece for himself. He talks with his mouth full like a rude boy.]

It's just regular island boar. You've had it a lot. They're not that cute, so I thought you might like it better, I guess.

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